lust love and beyond in the anandmaya kosha taking me towards Sri yantra, Devi upasna & raasleela with the self within!
- in eternal aum consciousness
- Mar 30, 2024
- 12 min read
Updated: Mar 31
A warning
The content in this blog may be a bit unsettling for some. So please read with an calm and open mind, as it explores the most intimate experiences and insights on the often taboo subject of love lust and sex. This is written from the male perspective, as I don't know the other side. ( I don't identify myself, neither do i intend to in future, as i am not as woke as some others are, which seems to be a new trend now a days!)
Energies:
Everyone has an element of masculine and feminine energy. Most of the times, it gets manifested as a gender. However, a male has female energies and a female has male energies too. These energies change over a period of time of the day and over lifetimes, based on events, thoughts, words and actions in life. Both male and female energies can be awakened by 4 margas of yoga, gyana, bhakti and karma. Though generally interpreted as gender, this arcticle concerns male and female energies and is referred as he/she, you/her etc.
Energies manifested in the divine:
lord Krishna and radharani, are an example of pure forms of male and female elements. The male is the giver and female the reciever. You need both the energies to operate the universe.
Merging of energies:
When an awakened masculine energy touches the awakened feminine, she flourishes—just like when a bee kisses the delicate petals of a flower, setting the process of fruit-bearing into motion. She is like that—vibrant, alive, and brimming with potential, waiting for the right energy to nurture her into full bloom.
He is like that, transmitting the energy to the female counterpart, his reservoir getting filled with divine nectar, reaching higher levels of consciousness!
The connection is not necessarily physical. Touch, feel etc is at the gross level. The connection is at the energy level, the mind level and beyond. The deep connection is only for a chosen few.
Awakening
So, when a woman, invites the awakened masculine—the one who sees the man, honors him, and takes him to heaven, not just in fleeting moments of intimacy, but in the depth of her soul’s journey. The man doesn’t conquer the woman; he expands her. He doesn’t possess her; he liberates her, as she liberate him!
Hence in shiv shakti tantra the woman, the shakti, the action, leads the process and the man is the witness. He sits still.
Visible changes:
When both experience this kind of presence frequently, something within both begins to transform. The face softens, the jawline refines, eyes gleam with a new light, and the body radiates an undeniable glow. One moves differently—gracefully, with strength, effortlessly, in a flow, as if the universe itself is guiding the steps.
Their laughter becomes richer, as if it carries the echoes of divine love. Their touch becomes healing, infused with warmth and tenderness. Their aura shifts, attracting not just admiration but deep reverence from those who sense the shift.
One feels more alive, more in tune with the rhythm of life. The skin glows with the softness of being cherished. The heart beats with the knowing that you are held, seen, and adored in your truest essence.
One no longer shrinks the self to be understood; instead, both expand into the fullness of who you are truly meant to be. Both of them no longer settle for half-hearted love; both of them welcome only what nourishes their individual soul.
Their bodies remember what it feels like to be truly met—to be touched with intention, to be looked at with devotion, to be spoken to with reverence. They both feel safe, not because one is being protected, but because one is deeply honored.
Just being rather than doing:
In the presence of awakened masculinity and femininity, one is not just desired—one is worshiped, not for what one does, but for who one is. softness is not a weakness; it is the most powerful gift.
So, let's not not wait for this love to find us. We Invite it. Call it forth with our being. Align ourself with the kind of love that does not deplete but nourishes. The kind of love that allows us to rest, bloom, and thrive.
Fulfillment:
For when they both create such energy, they both become unstoppable. They are no longer just a man or a woman—they are a force of nature, a god or goddess in their fullest expression.
Anandmaya kosha.
As the transition to anadmaya kosha begins, I am now slowly getting aware that the pure consciousness is manifested in all the energy and matter in the universe. The awareness is very tiny and Inconsistent, but it now exists.
Self love.
The self love transforms into love for everyone. Naturally, it also translates into lust, or sexual desire, as the energy unleashed is tremendous in the system.
Uncontrolled sexual urge.
With uncontrolled sexual energy, the mind takes over, and you slip back into the manomaya kosha from vigyanamaya kosha. This is a backward journey. It also depletes the energy and makes the body weaker by expending it's most important dhatu (out of the 7) veerya (semen), with a tendency to focus on the primal animal needs of sleeping, eating, mating and being in a fearful state. This does not serve the purpose of self realisation, as you are back to square one!
References from ancient Bharat.
There are many references of sages, getting attracted to divine female forms or apasaras, and getting diverted from their spiritual practices. The common thread in most of the stories is the uncontrollable desire, which originates as a function of their role of being a male. The moment was only one, in the thousands of years that they practised, but that one moment was enough to sometimes change the course of history, through the divine child, which was born out of the union.
Limitations of western science.
Though the Western science sees nothing wrong in even casual sex, as they have restricted themselves to the study of physical body. In santana culture, the body is seen with five layers or sheaths. Anything you do, be or have, impacts the first three. The other two, which are usually out of the reach, are an inner state, not impacted by anything.
While Western science sees the human as a bio chemical entity, sanatana Dharma sees us as Electro chemical entity, a combination of body energy and mind and beyond. That is the fundamental difference.
The experience of sex vs the blissful state.
A moment of bliss is felt when the mind goes blank, thoughtless during the act of sex and especially during orgasm or even to a smaller degree during masturbation. This being an experience, does not last and ends, with you craving for more. Obviously, perceived as a physical act, one can not possibly engage in this endlessly. The question is, can this "state" be achieved which is constant blissful state, instant of having a short lived experience?
Read here about chasing experiences.
Celibacy
In many paths, the word bhramacharya is associated with celibacy. If that was the case, the rishis and munis would not have married at all and have children! Most of us trace our ancestors to the gotras that are named after rishis. The true meaning of the word brahmacharya is the one who's being and doing is aligned to brahman. It does not forbid sex, but regulates it.
The reason celibacy was insisted upon in the student life was that the focus was on knowledge, which needs concentration to study, memorize, analyse, debate etc. Thoughts of sex do not play any role in enhancing the capabilities of the student.
Bachelor's for life.
In our family, there are some, who have dedicated their life to a cause, which was so dear to them, that they decided, not to get involved into the family life and have remained bachelors throughout life.
Objective
The whole idea is about not doing anything excessive, while maintaining balance, and do things that are appropriate for that role.
Sanatana Dharma
Is all about eternal duties, associated with the roles. If there is no role, no action is taken. This keeps things simple. There are no casual actions, diverting the mind, from the single minded focus of the vigyanamaya and anandamaya koshas.
Mataji
In many paths, all ladies are referred to as aai, or mother or mataji. The question is, is this being done by instruction of the guru or by deep understanding? It's easy to follow, but difficult to understand. Once you understand, you will automatically follow! You don't have to remember a rule book. It has to come naturally.
Not everyone is a mataji. Your partner in shiv shakti yoga is not mataji. She is a equal partner. This is where the judgement comes into play with intelligence.
There are ways to understand the aspect of love lust and sex from various koshas and other perspectives.
Let's see this from the energy perspective. There are two ways.
Sex is a the most Powerful (Reproductive) force.
Sexual energy creates life itself and is the most potent force accessible to us. Directing this properly is the key. Controlling it is not the answer.
1. Control it. Which is really difficult. This is like stopping the ball bowled by a fast bowler in cricket by a batsman. There are techniques like siddhasana etc, that can reduce the sexual urges to a great extent. Here the energy can be made to move upwards, but it takes a long time and effort to do so. You operate in the pranamyama kosha to control this urge. Control is not always successful.
2. Redirect it. It's like giving the fast ball a change of direction and it straight goes for the boundry! This is much more easier than stopping the force and it takes very less effort. Here the aim is to make the sexual energy rise upwards, as ojas, instead of its natural flow, which is downwards.
Before we do this, let's explore the identity perspective. it's important that one needs to be clear on their roles. Does one want an additional role of a lover or a boyfriend? If not, there is no point in pursuing this path. This makes it very clear that the roles i have in life are limited, clear and defined. There is no scope to start another role. This brings the clarity that people from opposite gender can just be two travellers on the same path, good soulmates, not intimate partners. It's possible.
I have many friends, from both genders, many ages, different varnas, followers of different gurus, who are in this path together. Being with them, speaking to them, opens new dimensions of thoughts and ideas, that are profound. Whenever there is an intuition to reach out to them, I do.
Let's see how to handle this from the mind perspective. Mind by nature is unusable. It's like a wild horse. The horse needs a rider of the self awareness to control it. This can done easily with eternal aum sound. The observation of the desire to be intimate, gives the freedom to you to decide what action to take or just let it pass, as mind keeps generating such thoughts and it's upto us, which ones to take seriously and which ones to ignore. Some people think that getting lustful thoughts is bad etc. There is nothing good or bad. If you are getting the thought as a boyfriend, it's ok to act on it. As that is your role. But, if it's not your role, then you have the freedom to ignore it. This is without any effort, rights and wrongs or rules.
Sexual transmutation.
In his book, think and grow rich, (the second largest selling book after the Bible, written in 1940s, on which i attended a superb training program from its India licensee, Sid Shah, where i made some great friends for life). The author writes about sexual transmutation. This simply means channelising the sexual energy towards a higher goal. This happens usually around 50 years of age, as one starts contemplating the deeper meanings of life and as middle age sets in and major responsibilities of life get over. The author, of the book is not able to pinpoint a process in the chapter. Other chapters are clear, except this one.
Nofap
Nofap is another practise, with lot of videos talking of its benefit. The action is the outcome of thoughts. When there are no thoughts, there is no question of action.. Instead of nofap, and counting days, why not direct the energy to the purpose?
Tantric sex.
In some tantric rituals, this is practised with a female partner. There are books and videos available on this in plenty. This is another dimension, which involves lot of rituals, which don't appeal to me much. It also needs a compatible partner, which is hard to find. This is not necessarily about an intercourse. If you are curious to know something about this, watch these videos from mr nandy.
Pornography and mobile access.
Pornography, which was restricted in it's access earlier with magazines and tapes, rather blue films, is now freely accessible to everyone with a mobile phone. All the research to write these blogs is also done on the same mobile phone. It's not the tool, it's how you use it, matters! Mobile phone is like a golden cup. Whether you drink water in it or take it to the toilet, depends on you. This stark, direct and seemingly crude example, will keep you away from unnecessary surfing, and make you use the mobile for better use, reading this blog, could be one of them!
Vigyanbhairav tantra
some techniques out of the 112 of the vigyan bhairav tantra, (a repository of all the methods for enlightenment), these 3 being a few of them, also means that a vast majority do not need to involve sex in the path to realise the self. Self realisation can also be done using sex as a method, but it's a very small portion of the available techniques. (I prefer a technique that is not dependent on any external object, person, ritual etc. Hence the focus on inner aum)
You can read about one of the techniques here. 48,49,50 are some of them.
This is an adaptation from oshos book in this subject.
Indian dieties.
Indian dieties are almost always shown with their consorts. Indicating that together, they are complete. Very few like ayyappa and Hanuman are bachelors, as they have a different purpose.
Every diety is a manifestation of the divine, to fulfill a specific purpose. As ones worships the diety, their qualities get imbibed in you. Hence in the akhadas, hanumanji is worshipped for strength. This is explained in detail in another blog....
Kamasutra.
Rather than just being a book of positions, it has a deeper symbolic meaning, which the western world reduced to just a handbook on sex, as their understanding is usually limited to the first three koshas.
The futility of having affairs.
Forget the emotional and moral aspects, which are ever changing and subjective and can be justified or ruled out based on the perspective. Let's Focus on the core.
It is clear the true happiness is not in relationships with the other person. See the link here
Hence there is no point in pursuing multiple relationships anyways. Hence having affairs does not make any sense.
The casual sex and prostituition factor.
This leaves casual sex and paid sex as the other two options. As they operate on a physical level, with no emotional connection, only lust, going down to level 1, from level 4 does not make any sense.
Single people.
A few of my friends are single, some have troubled marriages, some are in the process of being separated. As long as you identify yourself in the domain of the mind, you will seek happiness in relationships.
Once you operate in the self and bliss domain, the need for a companion, partner, lover, spouse reduces greatly. In this condition, when self and bliss full states are clear, one does not want to take up any additional roles in life.. With this clarity, one does not actively pursue a new relationship. If it happens, it happens. If it does not, it does not.
married life.
As bodies age, the physical connection reduces, energies deplete. In such cases, instead of increasing expectations having attachements and aversions, one does the role of the spouse properly, with full involvement and no attachement. The perspective is more about contribution than making demands from the partner.
Removing the doubts.
This makes the mind clear of all doubts and focused on the AnandMaya kosha, the ever blissful layer. This writing is not intended to be a blog on mortality. This is just to clear the perspective. The decision of what to do remains with the individual, usually based on what kosha they are operating in, at that moment.
Getting attracted to Sri yantra.
I was introduced to the Sri yantra By my friend utpal on the first day of navratri.
A blissful state of anadmaya kosha is best achieved by devi upasna, as the entire creation is divine itself.
Sri Devi, Durga, Kali... Here the feminine energy is seen in a divine form to be revered. This channelises the energy of love and lust into pure devotion.
The sriyantra is the geometric symbol of creation and is also the yantra for Devi upasana.
This means that all matajis are experienced as mother. Younger or older, they were all matajis, the form of the divine. Once this is set, the sexual desire vanishes. It also vanishes as you focus on the Sri yantra and go inwards layer by layer.
Insights into Sri yantra painting, which came by divine plan is given here
The sriyantra deity is bhagwati tripurasundari.
Relationship as a mother or a lover.
Just as a mother child relationship is sacred, the relationship between two divine lovers is sacred too. When you are in the triade of the mind body and energy, to keep the mind on track, you have motherly approach to the feminine form. However, as you cross the triade into the duet of self and bliss, you get into the loving relationship. This love is the manifestation of self, expressed in a different form, leading to a union, making everything complete.
Raas leela.
The ultimate form of love is the one Gopis had for lord Krishna. During my visit to vrindavan, it became clear that the raas leela is within, not outside anywhere.
You can read about the experience here.
Merger, union or samadhi or freedom
In yoga, when the union happens, it is an an internal union. In bhakti, the union with the manifested consciousness is also internal. The union of male and female energies, internally is hinted here. It's all within. To achieve this, absolute clarity is needed, so that the mind is un wavering. Hence this long blog post.
Blessing
May you balance, raise, channelise and ultimately transcend the sexual energy within, merge with the male and female energies within. May you be in eternal blissful state with inner aum sound.
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